Not Quite Paradise
by TheArchives
Summary: After Tokyo everything was different, and the bad seemed to outweigh the good. But that didn’t mean it had to stay that way forever. Acid Tokyo spoilers. Mild KuroFai.


Title: **Not Quite Paradise **  
Author: A  
Pairing: Kurogane/Fai  
Warnings: spoilers for Acid Tokyo, and AU after that arc.  
Rating: Oh…PG-13ish, for some slight gore and language.  
Disclaimer: Not mine. Not making money.  
Summary: After Tokyo everything was different, and the bad seemed to outweigh the good. But that didn't mean it had to stay that way forever.  
AN: Oneshot. Originally written for a challenge over on the kuroxfai livejournal, but not actually finished in time.

* * *

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"Take the path of least resistance,  
Into the great unknown..."

Bliss 66, _Not Quite Paradise_

_--------------------------- _

**1**  
Steel rang against steel, the sound clean and as sharp as the eyes watching each other, red and blue. They remained locked there for a long moment, mere inches apart, nothing but the cool calculation of battle to be found in either gaze.

But as quickly as the impasse had begun, it ended, a swift flurry of blows from the owner of the blue eye forcing them apart, and both men fell back, circling slowly and taking a moment to breathe.

It was a strange situation, Kurogane thought as he watched Fai's lithe, graceful pacing. Strange to be sparring with the other man in the first place, even stranger that Fai had been the one to suggest it.

He supposed that the mage was more bored than he had let on. They had been in this world two weeks, and although Mokona had thought there was a feather here upon their arrival, they were beginning to conclude that there wasn't a feather here after all.

Which meant that they had spent two weeks in this smelly, dirty, backward (people rarely even _bathed_ here) world. There were villages and small cities but nothing resembling "technology" like they had seen in Piffle or Outo. Houses were generally built of wood and thatch, the streets were little more than dirt lanes, muddy when it rained and always choked with the filth of people and animals. About the only interesting thing about the place was that, for the first time in their travels, they had discovered books (not that there were many of those here either, all kept in the religious houses called "monasteries") written in a language close enough to Fai's home tongue that he could read them.

Warriors were fairly well-respected here, at least, though all three men had had to prove themselves early on in their stay against some of the local toughs. Woman were not often respected, and Sakura never went anywhere without at least one of them accompanying her. The princess had not objected to the arrangement as long as she still got to be involved in the search for her feather. Fai might have protested that, but Kurogane had been quick to give her a curt nod of approval, secretly proud of the strength (of both body and spirit) that the princess was beginning to show.

But the lack of feather and the thought of wasted time made him tense and unhappy, so he had been quick to take Fai up on his offer of a spar, as startling as the request had been at first.

/Not that these "swords" are worthy of the name, much less sparring with,/ the ninja thought scathingly, not taking his eyes off his opponent. /Mediocre steel at best, dull, dirty, brittle…./ Compared to the quality of even cheap swords in Nihon, these were almost laughable. He was only using one to be fair, because Souhi would have shorn through one of these in a single blow.

Fai seemed comfortable enough with the weapon, though, his sword-fighting style similar to that of other fighters that Kurogane had seen here, though the mage seemed much more graceful and skilled about it. He eyed the man in question carefully, still circling. He hadn't even known that Fai knew how to use a sword at all, though he probably should have guessed, given how many other weapons the mage seemed to be proficient with.

Not that the ninja objected. Far from it; a skilled opponent was always welcome, even if he wasn't really on speaking terms with this particular one.

And that was part of the reason he'd accepted, he acknowledged to himself even as his sharp red eyes watched Fai's stance shift as he readied an attack. This fight felt like the closest they'd come to actually communicating in months.

The blond hadn't spoken more than a few handfuls of words directly to him in all the time since Tokyo, and had never once addressed him by anything other than his proper name. But this felt like talking, because a fight like this - a _duel_ like this - had its own kind of intimacy, and Kurogane wondered if Fai really even realized that.

And then the mage was moving, so fast, and the clash of steel filled Kurogane's ears again.

_Don't think it means a thing_, cautioned Fai's sword with dancing, teasing, never-quite-there feints, as if he knew what the ninja was thinking.

_I won't back down_, Kurogane let his own blade reply, following up the feints, pushing forward for a proper clash.

_I will keep my distance_, the other sword warned, feints switching abruptly to fast, sharp thrusts, snaking around the bigger man's guard.

_I won't back down_, the ninja's sword answered, moving to intercept every stab, knowing that several would have drawn blood if he hadn't, and knowing that the other man wouldn't have cared.

_My choices will be my **own**_, there was something harder in that single blue eye, and the mage's attacks met Kurogane's straight on, committed now for a full-out clash.

_I keep my promises_, he reminded fiercely, with eyes and sword, meeting Fai parry for parry, _so make your choice. I still won't back down_.

_Stop caring. I don't care._ And even though this attack was the most vehement yet, it opened up the mage's overly-careful defense, just a bit, and Kurogane pounced on the opening, driving the other man back, towards the worn wooden fence surrounding the back yard of the inn where they were currently residing.

_I will not back down_, he affirmed once more, pushing and pushing even though he knew it infuriated the other man under his indifferent smiles.

_I will not give in_, came the equally unbending reply from colder steel, the mage's movements once again fully controlled, almost painfully precise.

_I won't back down_, Kurogane was still driving the mage back, even if the initial opening was gone, and he was beginning to sense that the end of their spar was in sight.

_I won't forgive you-_

But there was a long scraping slide of steel on steel, a twist, a jerk, infinite seconds of ringing silence…and then a muffled clang as Fai's sword flew across the yard, landing on the packed dirt near the opposite fence.

_Even if you never care, never stop running, never forgive - I won't back down_, Kurogane let his own blade conclude the fight, its tip inches from Fai's throat, keeping the mage standing straight and tense against the wooden fence, his arms hanging limp at his sides and his eye just a little too wide.

"Well, Kurogane, it seems as though you've won this round," he said, covering the vulnerability a second later, giving his (now-common) polite, indifferent smile. But he stepped forward, closer to the blade still leveled at his throat, his eye open again and watching Kurogane with cold, intense calculation.

Kurogane stood his ground, even as Fai drew close enough for the sword point to touch the skin of his neck, to draw a tiny bead of crimson blood, the expression in his eye shifting into a terrible kind of want…but he froze there, that one drop of blood rolling slowly down his neck as they faced off in a different sort of battle.

And Kurogane knew that his own expression must have grown almost frighteningly distant in that moment, but he _didn't back down_, because he kept all of his promises. If the mage truly wished to die, Kurogane would keep that promise. If it broke him, he would keep it…but it wasn't the only promise he had given the other man, even if it was the only one he had stated explicitly aloud.

_I'll be here_, he repeated silently, the promise he'd made, knowingly and implicitly, when he had agreed to become the mage's sole source of life. But he wouldn't say this one out loud; wasn't quite sure how, and didn't want to give the other man a chance to deliberately misinterpret it, to slip around it or ignore it. It was better left unspoken, better shown than said.

_I'll be here._

Fai stared at him still, but that horrible _need_ was leaving his face, leaving behind only a brief moment of something like confusion and fright and wonder all mixed up together…but then he was stepping back, away from the sharpened steel, the tiny wound on his throat already closing, his mask firmly back in place.

"Fai-san! Kurogane-san!"

They both turned as Sakura came into the yard, waving to them and smiling apologetically.

"The feather isn't here," she told them, "we went out to the last place Mokona thought it might be, but it was something else, so we can move on whenever you're ready."

"Hn," Kurogane grunted, sheathing his sword and reverting to his usual scowl. "Damn manjuu bun, imagining things."

"Mokona wasn't imagining things!" the creature in question pouted, bouncing into the yard and up onto Kurogane's head, successfully avoiding his snarling attempts to snatch it. "It was really hard to tell!"

"Were you and Kurogane-san fighting?" Sakura asked Fai, looking at the sword at Kurogane's belt and the other lying discarded on the other side of the yard.

"Just a spar," Fai replied, smiling a friendlier smile for the princess to ease her worry. "We wouldn't want to get out of shape, would we?"

"All right then," Sakura replied, returning the smile as best she could. Kurogane watched her carefully even as he pretended to chase Mokona around the yard, wishing the damn mage would cut the fake smiles a little, if only for Sakura's sake.

Syaoran appeared in the yard then, too, saying hesitantly, "I've paid the innkeeper, so that's taken care of…."

"Thank you, Syaoran-kun," Fai said, smiling at the boy too, "just let us get our things."

"Tch. Next world had better be _clean_," Kurogane grumbled as Mokona fled to the safety of Sakura's arms. "Leave it," he growled at the mage, then, for the other man had started hesitantly for his fallen weapon. "If you want a sword, we'll get you a _real_ one," he qualified, not missing Fai's quick blink of surprise.

"I just thought it might be good manners to clean it off and return it properly, Kurogane," he replied coolly.

"Not worth it, for trash like that," Kurogane scoffed, removing the one he'd been using from his belt and tossed it over to land with the other one. Fai hesitated again, but let it go, seeming to realize abruptly that they had already interacted far more today than he usually allowed. Kurogane wondered what all of it meant, but realized that the kids were looking at them curiously, and decided that further speculation would have to wait. "Let's go. I want a damn bath."

And though they didn't say much else, the others definitely agreed, for they were all just as quick to gather their things and return to the yard, where Mokona spread his wings and swallowed them all up in a swirl of light.

* * *

**2**  
Kurogane stumped along protectively behind Sakura, glaring at anyone who dared to look twice at her and tugging irritably at the bed sheet he was currently attired in. 

Syaoran, after speaking with the natives on their arrival in this world, had said that it was called a "toga." It was a symbol of status, he had explained, only men of a certain standing could wear them. Fai had then managed to convince the natives that _they_ should all be granted whatever status was necessary to wear the things, somehow.

Kurogane was still of the opinion that it was a glorified bed sheet with ambitions towards giving him a headache, since to actually get the thing to remain _on_ and _decent_ required a complicated set of folds and twists that the ninja still couldn't quite work out on his own.

He was surprised that Fai had offered to help him, on that first morning when Fai had entered their shared room and found him struggling with the stupid thing. He was less surprised when the mage did so without any hint of teasing whatsoever; there had been just a flicker of amusement in the icy-blue eye, but it was quickly gone and had not returned.

Kurogane hadn't realized he would miss the idiot's teasing quite this much (not that he would ever admit to missing it at _all_, even under pain of torture), but he did. Teasing would be something, at least, even if it only pissed him off. It would be something, which would be better than nothing.

Because right now, "nothing" was all he and Fai had.

No teasing, no nick-names, not even any anger or hate - not that the mage was willing to show. Only cool indifference, as if they'd been perfect strangers instead of…whatever they were now. Or weren't now.

And damn it if the mage still managed to give him headaches, even when he _wasn't_ trying.

Kurogane sent a particularly vicious glare at a young man who was looking at Sakura with just a little too much obvious interest, and moved to stand closer behind her where she had stopped at a stall in the market square, and was asking the owner politely about prices. She'd get a good one - probably without even having to bargain much. (Kurogane thought it must be a trick common to all princesses, because Tomoyo had certainly been able to get far too many people to do her bidding just by sitting back and looking adorable and defenseless.)

Although Kurogane had to admit that the mage had been…perhaps a tiny bit better, since that sword fight they'd had a couple of worlds back. He was catching glimpses of things - amusement, annoyance, mischievousness - behind the mage's calm façade. It wasn't much, but…

/Better than nothing./ Kurogane shook his head, frowning thoughtfully now, and following vaguely behind the princess as she thanked the stall owner with a bright smile and moved on to the next, collecting the ingredients for tonight's dinner.

He did not grumble about being forced to go shopping with the princess, because he knew that _she_ was just as displeased with the situation as he was, and pointing out that it was stupid wouldn't help either of them. Women did not usually have very high status in this world, it seemed - they were expected to stay at home and run the household. This left Sakura unable to do much in regards to finding her feather (and there was a feather here, this time they were sure of it), and although she had not yet complained, there was a grim sort of determination in her as she went about her daily routine of keeping up their small house that let Kurogane know she was not pleased. So he kept quiet as he followed her protectively around the market and then back home, where he helped out with some of the more manual chores as best he could.

No, he didn't blame her; especially since, for once, _he_ was the one who stayed at home with her. In the past, that had been Fai's usual position - "Mommy," as Mokona had liked to joke. But this world was different…and so was everything, really, since Tokyo. Nothing was "usual" anymore, if it had ever been.

Because, in addition to wearing bed sheets, the men of this world liked to _talk_, and _discuss_, and _debate_, in some large group they called the "Senate," according to Syaoran, who seemed to have unconsciously inherited some of his clone's interest in cultures.

And of course, when it came to _talking_ with people to find out information, the choice between sending Fai and sending Kurogane was…no choice at all, really. And since girls were supposed to stay home, and since boys Syaoran's age were often apprenticed to these "Senate" people…it had all been rather obvious as to who would be doing what, in this world.

Which didn't mean that Sakura and Kurogane (or even Mokona, for that matter, who also had to stay hidden away inside) had to be particularly happy about it.

"We're home!" Syaoran called politely as the missing members of their party came in the front door.

"Welcome back," Sakura said, smiling a bit hesitantly (but genuinely) at the boy and then up at the blond man behind him. "How did things go today, Fai-san?"

"Just fine, Sakura-chan," Fai said, smiling back at her. "The debates were quite intense, but I managed to talk to quite a few people while they were going on. We have a good lead now, so I'll try and follow up on that tomorrow."

"Thank you," Sakura said, clasping her hands in front of her and gazing down at them. "I wish I could help-"

Syaoran replied softly, "It's no trouble." Then, more eagerly, he went on, "They really do have a very interesting social structure. For example, each of the Senators, if they reach a high enough rank within the Senate, gets to take a turn as the governor of one of the provinces that has been conquered, and-"

"Don't fret about it, Sakura-chan," Fai said, cutting the boy off gently and tilting her chin up. "It's kind of fun, actually, listening to all the debates and speeches. But here - I'll help you with dinner."

Kurogane gave Fai a sharp look that the mage returned. He was displeased with Fai's overly-protective tendencies towards the princess, but knew that no good would come of trying to broach the subject. So, he just shrugged and turned to go finish the laundry he'd been helping the princess with. A wealthy household here would have servants to do that kind of thing, normally, but they were not actually wealthy (whatever the mage had talked these "Senate" people into believing), nor would they be here long enough for it to matter, if all went well.

Dinner and the rest of the evening passed much as usual, with the kid and the manjuu bun and sometimes the princess doing their best to fill up the silence between the elder members of their party, though Fai was happy enough to talk with Sakura or Mokona if they spoke to him first.

"Shall I help you wash up, Sakura-hime?" Syaoran offered tentatively when they were done.

Sakura hesitated for a moment in which Fai smiled and opened his mouth to say something, but she took a deep breath and replied, quietly but firmly, "Yes, please. I'd…I'd like that. And…you can tell me more about the Senate. It sounds interesting."

Fai shut his mouth and blinked in surprise. Kurogane found himself suppressing a smirk, but did give the kids an approving nod before rising and stretching. "I'm going to bed. Don't stay up too late."

"Are you sure-" the mage tried again, but Sakura just turned and smiled sweetly at both of them, and nodded.

"Yes, Fai-san. Moko-chan can help us too, ne?"

"Yahoo!" Mokona bounced over to the princess from where he'd been scarfing down the leftovers on Kurogane's plate. "Mokona can help dry! Mokona wants to hear about the Senate too!"

"Get some rest, Fai-san, Kurogane-san. You've both worked hard today, I know," Sakura said, hugging Mokona and rising to help Syaoran gather dishes.

Kurogane nodded again, and turned to leave, watching with well-hidden amusement as the mage, seeming slightly at a loss, did the same. They retreated in silence to their room at the back of the small house.

"Well, I suppose that's that for today then. I suppose your day was fine, Kurogane?" Fai went on a moment later, just as indifferently as always, still walking and not seeming to expect an answer.

And so, just to throw the other man off and because they had nothing else, Kurogane answered.

"It was all right. Went out with the princess. Helped her with the laundry when the line was too high. Chopped some wood."

He felt awkward, more so when the other man stopped and blinked at him, but damn it, they had to start over _somewhere_. He didn't particularly want to go on as they currently were forever. So he just glared back and asked gruffly, "You?" his voice challenging Fai to ignore him when _he_ had answered.

"I - It was fine. Syaoran-kun seems to be having fun."

"Seems like you'd enjoy that kind of thing, too," Kurogane grumbled, half under his breath, as he began tugging off the bed sheet, fully intent on changing back into _real_ clothes now that the day was over. He tossed the offending cloth into a corner and pulled on a pair of loose pants that he'd found in one world and kept.

Fai, making a small noise of annoyance, crossed the room and picked up the discarded clothing, shaking it out and folding it neatly.

"Thirsty?" Kurogane asked then, because the blond hadn't quite retreated behind his silent mask yet.

"No," Fai answered, and the ninja sensed no lie in his voice, so he let it go.

He flopped down onto his own bed, crossing his arms behind his head. Fai, having dealt with Kurogane's clothing, hesitated in discarding his own, looking towards the door with a frown barely hidden under his calm mask.

"The kids are fine. Stop pretending you care and go to bed," Kurogane said without opening his eyes. He could almost _feel_ the narrow-eyed looked the mage shot him, and opened one crimson eye slightly in response.

"Despite what you may think, Kurogane, I am not pretending," the blond returned, covering the acidity in his voice by turning to his bed. "I am worried about Sakura-chan -"

"Ch'," was all Kurogane replied, now watching the other man with both eyes open. "If you really cared, you'd be letting her get stronger, not sheltering her like a mother-hen. Just another damned excuse to keep your distance."

"And I suppose you think that letting her go out and get herself _half-killed_ is better-"

"Letting her fight her own battles is better," Kurogane interrupted the mage again, letting the 'whether it's against monsters or in her troubles with the kid' remain unspoken, knowing that Fai would understand.

The blond finished taking off his own toga in silence, shaking it out with a snap and folding it neatly before going on, very quietly, "Besides, if I get close, then I _will_ hurt her."

"You're an _idiot_," Kurogane burst out, without really meaning to, sitting up and glaring as the mage jumped and turned to him, startled. "_Nothing_ that we've been through has broken her yet. And nothing has broken the kid, and nothing's broken me. Nothing's even broken _you_. We can all take whatever's coming."

Fai was staring at him, frozen with his blue eye wide, as if hovering on the edge of running. "I-"

"You keeping your distance isn't going to help _anyone_ in the end," Kurogane finished, his anger draining away. He was so tired of this… "Just go to bed." It's not like the mage would actually listen to anything he said. He lay down and closed his eyes again, a tired grimace passing over his face at the thought.

"I-"

And the ninja was glad that he peeked at the mage again, for he was just in time to catch the very odd expression that passed over Fai's face in that moment as he lifted his head.

"What?"

Fai stared at him, that strange expression - helpless and yet almost hopeful, somehow - still on his face. Then, suddenly realizing he was being too open, he lowered his head again and turned away, murmuring, "Good night, Kurogane."

Kurogane watched him carefully for a moment more, but finally muttered, "'Night," not quite grudgingly, and closed his eyes for good this time.

He didn't know what it meant, didn't know if it meant anything at all. But, as he drifted off to sleep, he thought that maybe - just maybe - things could get better.

* * *

**3**  
Pain pulled Kurogane into consciousness, throbbing down his sword arm, across his back and on the side of his head that would no longer be ignored. Grunting, he shifted, assessing the damage as painful, but not life-threatening. He opened blood-red eyes onto complete darkness, taking a few minutes to adjust his sight to the lack of light. 

He was in a cell, hands bound behind his back, propped haphazardly in a corner. He was alone.

Frowning, Kurogane tried to remember what had happened. They had arrived in a new world, and it was night. He remembered dropping out of Mokona's light…remembered sensing people around them…remembered glowing eyes, gleaming fangs…the princess' scream, a brief fight…true darkness.

/Captured,/ he decided then, and lucky not to be worse injured than he was. /Vampires,/ was the next thing to cross his mind, both like and unlike Fai, if the brief glimpses he remembered were any indication.

Struggling somewhat painfully to his feet, he paced across the cell to the bars and peered out. There were no lights in the hall, and no sense of guards. /Weird./

"Kid? Princess?" He called out quietly, sensing dimly through cold stone that his companions were nearby.

"(&$&?" came Syaoran's voice in response, and Kurogane cursed fluently. /Where the hell is the damn manjuu bun?/

"&($&," the princess' voice, subdued but not pained, came, reassuring him that the kids, at least, were alive and nearby.

"Mage?" he asked then, casting his senses out, but failing to find the blond. A coldness settled into his stomach, replaced quickly by a hot wash of anger. /If that idiot has gone and gotten himself killed…./ But Kurogane didn't think so. There was a tie between them now, much as the mage might hate it, and it didn't feel…broken. Didn't feel empty where his sense of "Fai" was.

But he was not here, either.

It was with growing frustration that Kurogane realized he really had no option except to wait, and see what might happen. He was bound, caged, without a weapon and without any knowledge of where they were. He couldn't even communicate properly with the kids.

"I'm fine," he said aloud anyway, "stay put." They wouldn't understand him, but hopefully his tone would be a reassurance, at least. He got replies that sounded like "yes" in response, and sat down again, both to calm his growing frustration and to ease the throbbing in his head.

He did not count heartbeats to pass the time, and so did not know how long he sat there in the dark, feeling more helpless by the moment and hating it, searching for any change in the darkness that greeted both his eyes and his inner senses.

Nothing, nothing, and still time crept inexorably on.

Then, just as Kurogane felt that he might have to get up and have a go at the bars just to break the tension, he thought he heard a muffled noise from somewhere down the corridor to the right. He froze, stilled breathing and slowed heartbeat in an attempt to hear more…

And then, abruptly, there was the loud clang of a sturdy door being shoved open, dim flickering light and unfamiliar voices.

"Hurry, hurry!"

"We should feed, quickly, or we won't have the strength to run."

"There isn't time-"

The voices were strange, slightly hissing…and perfectly understandable.

"Kid?" Kurogane risked a hoarse whisper.

"Kurogane-san?" Syaoran's voice came back, just as quiet, but there wasn't time to say more, only register a brief wave of relief that at least Mokona was nearby again before turning blood-red eyes to meet the equally blood-red (and glowing) eyes of two of their captors.

"No, there wouldn't be," the second vampire agreed with his companion's previous statement, stopping in front of Kurogane's cage, "except that he's distracted by the others and we've such a lovely meal all ready and waiting right here…."

"I suppose," the first grumbled, shifting restlessly. "But make it quick."

"You take the two smaller ones," demon eyes did not release Kurogane's even as he heard the other vampire start to move down the cell block, "and this one will be mi-"

It cut off with a choked scream before falling to the floor in a heap of lacerated flesh and a spray of blood.

Kurogane barely had time to register a blurred spin of blond hair before there was another choked scream from a few steps further down the hall, and the unpleasant sound of a body hitting the floor wetly.

Then Fai was standing in front of his cell again, fingernails elongated into three-foot claws, drenched in blood, and meeting Kurogane's stunned gaze with a wide, cat-slit blue eye that nearly _glowed_ with rage and fear and odd shades of hungry possessiveness.

"Are you hurt?"

Fai's voice was very soft.

"I'm fine," Kurogane said, recovering enough from his shock to cover it under his habitual gruffness.

"_Are you hurt?_"

He found himself unable to look away from that beautiful, frightening eye, nor could he fight the commanding tone in that too-quiet voice.

"A little," he acknowledged, stepping toward the bars slowly as Fai raised a hand and slashed through them as if they'd been butter instead of metal.

"They hurt you," Fai confirmed, his eye now raking up and down Kurogane's body, finding and cataloguing injuries. Something in that soft voice made Kurogane want to shiver, want to ask what had happened and why the mage was dripping blood…but as he met the intense blue gaze again, he couldn't quite find voice for the questions.

"Come," Fai ordered curtly, turning and stepping past the remains of both vampires to move down the hall to find the kids.

They had been put in separate cells, across from each other, and Syaoran seemed to be reassuring Sakura in a low voice as they approached. They both turned at the sound of footsteps.

"Kurogane-san! Fai-san!" Sakura called out gladly, but Fai's name ended on a choked note, her green eyes widening as she saw the state of the mage. "F-Fai-san?"

Something flickered briefly through the mage's eye, but he only said quietly, "Stand at the back wall, both of you," and proceeded to cut them free as soon as they had obeyed. When they were free, he went on softly, "Mokona, you can come out now."

The little creature crawled out from its hiding place under the collar of Fai's cloak and the long fall of his hair, quite subdued (but not, miraculously, stained with any of the blood that the mage himself was coated with).

"It's best if you stay with Sakura-chan," Fai explained, voice still just this side of too soft and too calm. "We need to get her feather before we can leave."

"Fai-san, what happened?" Sakura asked, shaking a bit but still looking at the mage and keeping her voice steady. Syaoran, hovering near her shoulder but not touching her, nodded.

"You were captured. I have gotten you out. We will get Sakura-chan's feather and go," Fai said, already turning and heading back up the corridor the way he had come. "Your sword is out here, Kurogane."

Sakura made another distressed noise as they passed the remains of the two vampires, but otherwise made no sign of weakness.

/She's getting stronger,/ Kurogane thought, sad that she should have to see such things, but still proud of her. The thought was distant, though; he was finding it difficult to focus on anything other than Fai just now.

Weapons were collected, and they moved on, up more stairs to get out of the dungeon they had been locked in. There were more torches here, as well, as they moved further into what seemed to be a castle, which made the bodies all that much easier to see. Vampires, all of them, and all dead of the same violent laceration as those down in the dungeon.

It was no wonder Fai was so covered in blood; he had not, it seemed, taken the capture of his companions lightly.

Which was surprising, in a way - Kurogane had thought that the mage would be glad of an excuse to distance himself more. Perhaps he'd been underestimating the changes in the blond man after all.

More and more vampires as they wound their way up, all dead, until at last they reached a great pair of doors, closed tightly and, when Syaoran tested them, barred firmly from the other side.

"Stand back, kid," Kurogane said, voice low, unsheathing Souhi and sweeping her around in a bright, explosive attack all in one swift movement. The doors crumbled, and Fai strode ahead of them into the enormous hall that was now revealed.

There were live vampires here, and they hissed in anger and fear as the blond entered the room, drawing themselves together and back towards the farther wall, at which sat a dais and a throne.

Fai, claws still extended, face a stone-cold mask with a burning blue eye, paced cat-like down the hall, looking only at the vampire who sat enthroned upon the dais.

"What- What do you want, demon?" the king (for that was what Kurogane took him for) asked, his voice a low hiss in an attempt to hide his fright.

"The feather that you hold captured in your scepter," Fai answered, voice still quiet and nearly pleasant.

The king seemed to pull himself together a little, his red eyes narrowing. "And what makes you think I would hand such an heirloom over to you-"

Fai's claws appearing abruptly at his throat made him choke off the end of his sentence, freezing in place, though his desire to bolt was easy to read.

"Now," Fai asked, still almost pleasant, "I think I need not explain the consequences if you don't." His cheerful smile did not at all match the expression in his single, icy blue eye. "Now."

The feather was hovering over his hand a half second later, and he straightened, moving confidently away from the throne, and though Kurogane tensed a bit at the vulnerability of turning his back to enemies, it seemed that the mage was right and that the remaining vampires were too frightened to attack him.

"Here, Sakura-chan," he said, the murderous edge gone from his voice, but his eye was shut and curved up in a pleasant smile that told Kurogane all he needed to know about the mage's current mental state. "Now, Mokona, shall we go?"

"Yes," the little creature, still much too somber, replied, jumping from Sakura's shoulder to spread its' wings over them. Rainbow light swirled, and Kurogane couldn't help but mark the odd contrast to the otherwise dimly-lit room, with the shapeless crowd of hissing, spitting vampires as the backdrop for their departure.

And then they were falling….

* * *

**4**  
…and falling… 

…until they tumbled once again out of Mokona's mouth to land with a soft thud on the white-gold sand of a beach.

Kurogane sat up slowly, mindful of his injuries, and blinked around, unable to tell whether it was the bright light or the nearly comical contrast to the previous world that was throwing him off more.

They were indeed, on a beach. The sun shone down bright and hot from a cloudless blue sky, a beautiful sparkling ocean rolled calmly into the shore in front of them, and behind them rose the emerald of a jungle, green leaves swaying in the warm ocean breeze. It was quiet save for the steady crash of waves, the wind, and the occasional faint birdcall from the trees; peaceful.

Fai was standing a few paces away, his back to them, claw-tipped, blood-stained hands raised in front of his face. He was shaking violently.

"Kid," Kurogane said quickly to Syaoran, who was helping Sakura up, "take the princess and the manjuu bun and go look around a bit."

The boy followed his gaze to the wizard and nodded immediately. Sakura and Mokona, after shooting worried looks at the blond man themselves, did not protest, though Sakura did give Kurogane a pleading look to which he gave a slight nod.

/I'll do the best I can,/ he thought as the kids headed for the tree-line. /But if he doesn't want to be helped, then there's nothing more I can do./

Pushing such thoughts aside, he strode carefully over to the other man, circling around to be in front of Fai where the wizard could see him easily.

"Mage?" he asked quietly.

Fai was staring with a narrowed, cat-slit blue eye at shorter, but still deadly and blood-encrusted, claws.

"Ma-" Kurogane began again, but cut himself off as Fai suddenly _blurred_, and the ninja found his face framed by razor-sharp claws, the mage's long delicate-seeming fingers oddly gentle on his face. Odd, because of the rage, so cold it seemed to burn, filling the other man's good eye.

"Kurogane," the other man said, voice quiet and flat, "be silent. Be still."

Not that Kurogane had to be told _that_. Every muscle in his body was taut with the effort to hold himself still, the effort to contain his instinctual reaction to the warning of "Threat!" that his mind was screaming at him. He wanted to move back, move away, reach for Souhi still sheathed at his hip….

He stayed still, and quiet, only letting crimson eyes narrow at the other man to indicate his displeasure.

"This is your fault," Fai went on, almost conversationally, the voice at odds with his expression. Kurogane had never seen the other man so angry.

"What is my fault?" he asked, not particularly caring whether Fai wanted him to talk or not. He needed answers, and meant to have them, even if Fai's current mood would make that rather like playing with fire.

"Everything," the blond man hissed, his fingers flexing, though the edges of those claws never _quite_ touched Kurogane's skin. "All of this is your fault. If you hadn't been so ridiculously _stubborn_-"

"If I hadn't been so stubborn, we'd _all_ be dead now," the ninja growled, glaring back and looking pointedly to the blood on Fai's claws, reminding the other man that if he hadn't been there, their chances of escaping that last world would have been slim indeed.

Fai froze for a brief second but then his eye, still cat-slit and burning with anger, narrowed again and he began stroking Kurogane's face lightly, claws ghosting over tanned skin. "Perhaps, perhaps not. But you will regret this, before the end. You will not let me go and-"

"I'm not the one regretting things," Kurogane pointed out, holding very still. "And if you're so determined to leave, then why haven't you tried?"

"Only to have you drag me back again, Kurogane? Such an exercise in futility would only be a waste of both our energy." Fai's hands stilled again.

Kurogane just looked at him pointedly for a long moment before saying quietly, "We both know that you could leave if you really tried. I'm not what's holding you back."

"You _are_ what's holding me back! The children and Mokona and _you!_" Fai snarled and Kurogane found himself _shoved_, so hard that he stumbled, tripping over the sand and falling. He blinked up at the other man, startled and bewildered.

"Magician?" he whispered, cautiously.

"All of you," the shorter man whispered, his head now bowed so that his long, pale hair shaded his face. His claws finally finished retreating into normal fingernails, and he clenched his hands into fists at his sides, shaking. "All of you and I can't…."

/He's…not really angry with me,/ Kurogane began to realize, sitting up carefully and watching the other man.

Fai just stood there, not seeming inclined to say anything more. With a grunt, Kurogane got to his feet and pulled off his cloak, tossing it at the other man. The blond started, mostly catching it before it hit him, and blinked at the ninja, confusion warring with anger in his eye.

"Go clean up. You can wear that while your clothes dry. It's not cold." Kurogane gestured to the ocean, then turned his back and trekked back up the beach to settle himself in the shade at the edge of the forest, crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes.

A deeper shadow covering him a little while later alerted him to Fai's presence, and he cracked one crimson eye to see the other man standing over him, wrapped in the too-big cloak, his face blank. His clothes were on a low bush nearby.

They stared at each for a long moment. Finally, Fai broke the silence, saying "I'm hungry" in a neutral voice.

"Okay," Kurogane said, reaching for Souhi where she lay on the ground beside him.

"No," Fai stopped him, kneeling down and stilling the ninja's movement with a hand on his arm. "No."

Kurogane looked up at him, confused, but stilled at the look in Fai's eye. It had reverted to its vampiric form again, this time not with anger, but with hunger - that same _possessive_ hunger that Kurogane had seen there in the dungeon.

Fai lifted his hands to Kurogane's face again, one to thread through black hair and tilt the ninja's head, the other to extend a claw, just slightly, and cut open a small, careful wound on the ninja's neck. Then he bent down, pressing lips and tongue to the welling blood, and drank.

Kurogane froze at the hand on his hair, had to fight off the instinct to push Fai back at the feeling of that claw slicing neatly through his skin in so vulnerable a place. But then Fai was drinking and the instinct receded, letting him appreciate this new sensation.

It was different than when the other man drank from his wrist. It was more _real_, in a way, since using his wrist had allowed Fai to be so impersonal about it…and this was anything but impersonal. It was intimate, much more so than Kurogane was used to being with anyone, and surprisingly _pleasant_ feeling. Feedings before had not really felt like much of anything, beyond the initial sting and the constant pull of blood.

But this…the pulling sensation was still there, but Kurogane found himself much more inclined to just relax into this, to the warmth of Fai's mouth at his neck and the hand still stroking gently through his hair. He felt, remembering the possessiveness in that sky-blue eye, as though he were being marked in ways that he hadn't been before. As though Fai was maybe, finally, accepting this.

/Good,/ he thought, sinking back a little further against the tree, tilting his head a touch more to let Fai drink more easily.

A few minutes later the wizard finished, licking up the last drops of blood with quick, purposeful strokes of his tongue before pulling away and putting a little distance between them before sitting down, still carefully wrapped in Kurogane's cloak. Kurogane shivered a little at the licking - it felt much stranger on his neck than it ever had against his wrist - and looked at the other man, content to stay quiet for the time being.

Fai, for his part, seemed to pull into himself a little bit, closing his eye as he cleaned the last blood from his lips. Then he looked back up, meeting Kurogane's gaze with a tired expression of his own.

"I guess there's no helping it, then," he murmured, and Kurogane couldn't tell if the words had been meant for him or not. "You won't let me go, no matter how hard I try. What's the point of drawing lines if they'll only be crossed?"

"You weren't angry at me, were you?" Kurogane asked, quietly, wanting to know if his guess from earlier was right but not wanting to push the other man away, either.

"I was angry at you," Fai said at length, voice resigned, "but I am also angry at myself."

"Why?"

"For a lot of reasons," the blond answered, obviously avoiding the question, but there was no real unease in his voice. Kurogane eyed him for a moment more, but accepted it. They'd just taken some significant steps to being back on civil ground again, and the ninja didn't feel like pushing his luck.

Hopefully Fai would open up of his own accord, eventually.

"Well, we're all safe," he reminded the blond, settling back against the tree and closing his eyes again. After a few moments, rustling cloth told him that Fai had lain down as well, and they both rested in not-uncomfortable silence until the kids returned.

They eventually did so, bearing armfuls of edible fruit for dinner (the sun was now going down) and relieved to see Fai clean and mostly back to normal. He apologized to them for the scare, and Sakura assured him that she was just glad everyone was safe. Syaoran nodded, and Mokona gave Fai a cheerful hug before bouncing over to steal the fruit Kurogane had warily begun to eat. He, of course, immediately rose to chase the meat bun down the beach, which immediately had Sakura giggling happily and Syaoran ducking his head to hide an amused grin. Even Fai's mouth seemed inclined to twitch upwards at the familiar spectacle.

And, Kurogane thought as he rejoined them sometime later, plopping the manjuu bun onto Fai's shoulder, everything felt just a little bit more normal.

* * *

**5**  
This latest world was more familiar, at least for Kurogane. Its culture was not quite that of Nihon, but it was similar in many ways. Clothes and food were slightly off, but they were civilized enough to eat with chopsticks, at least. Other things were more "normal" as well - Fai was staying home to look after the kids and help them search for the feather while Kurogane went out to work and earn them some money. This promised to be a long stay, so they couldn't count on their initial funds lasting the entire time. 

Unfortunately, the demons that Kurogane was hiring himself out as a mercenary to fight were proving more difficult to kill than anything he'd encountered in quite some time.

Kurogane sat in the entryway of the small house, staring frustrated down at Souhi where the sword lay unsheathed across his lap.

/This probably won't work anyway, but it definitely won't work if I can't even remember the damned words…/ Closing his eyes in concentration and holding one hand out palm-down over the blade, he dredged his memory for the words he needed, lost under the horrors that had come after.

"Soaring Dragon…who commands…" that was the beginning, he was fairly sure, "the…" but his mother's voice was too faint in his memory, "…that protects…guard the…guard the…." Breaking off with a snarl, the ninja rose, grabbing the sheath as he stood. /What's the point in praying to a dead god, anyway?/

"What's the matter, Kurogane?" Fai asked from behind him.

Kurogane finished sheathing Souhi before turning to face the blond man leaning in the doorway that led to the kitchen.

"Nothing," he told Fai, settling the sword at his waist and reaching for his cloak.

"What were you trying to do?" The blond man paced forward a little more, his expression gently curious.

Kurogane hesitated, but lately Fai had been speaking to him more again, and the dark-haired man had been doing his best to return the favor. He didn't want to make the same mistakes over again…

"I was trying to remember a prayer that the miko of Nihon sometimes say for warriors," he explained briefly, "but I can't."

"I see," Fai said, and was quiet as Kurogane finished fastening his cloak and headed for the door. "Why do you need it?"

He paused with a hand on the door handle and looked back, admitting quietly, "The demons here are harder to kill than I'd thought. I can do it, but I thought that the blessing might help."

Fai blinked at the admission, but then nodded and waved Kurogane off. "Well, be careful. Have a good day."

"I'm going then," Kurogane replied automatically, still wrapped up enough in his own memories that he didn't catch Fai's thoughtful look before the door closed behind him.

The next morning Kurogane ate breakfast with the other four as usual before heading for the entryway to get ready to go. He looked at Souhi for a long moment before shaking his head and sitting down to pull on his boots. He wished he could remember his mother's last prayer for his father, but in the light of everything else that had happened that night the words had just faded too much.

"Kurogane."

He turned to see Fai standing behind him, his blond hair unbound over his shoulders and his right hand raised, clutching a familiar-looking branch.

"Mage?" he asked, eyes widening at what he couldn't believe Fai was implying.

"Draw your sword, Kurogane," Fai said, still holding his gaze steadily and taking another step forward.

Kurogane stared at him. It was not, the ninja thought, that he had any particular objections to getting married. He just thought it would have been nice to have known about it beforehand.

Closing crimson eyes and letting out a low breath that was almost a chuckle, he did as Fai bid, rising to unsheathe Souhi before dropping to one knee before the mage, sword presented parallel over his head.

"_Soaring Dragon who commands the water that protects Suwa,_" Fai began, his voice low and solemn, "_Guard the carrier of the heirloom named after you._" He passed the sakaki branch slowly down the length of the blade. "_Grant protection to Suwa._"

Kurogane, still holding that intense blue gaze, couldn't say for certain whether or not the air between them actually shimmered, or whether or not Souhi's blade glowed just a bit to show that the prayer had worked, but he did know that his breath caught sharply as _something_ passed between them.

Fai's eye closed, and the mage took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as he stepped back. Kurogane, still feeling dazed, rose and sheathed Souhi. He hesitated for a brief second, staring down at Fai, waiting for the other man to open his eye again, and then went with his impulse, catching up a lock of blond hair and raising it briefly to his lips. Fai blinked at him as he released the gold strands and turned away, reaching for his cloak.

"I'm going," he said, turning to look back at the other man.

Fai recovered from his surprise and gave Kurogane a hint of a calm smile. "Go and come back safely."

"I will," he promised. He shook off the remnants of his daze, and went out.

He wondered about it all day, though, in those few spare moments for thought that he had. Wondered about where Fai could possibly have learned that prayer. Wondered at the fact that Souhi seemed to slice through the demons so much more smoothly than before, that their defeat was easier.

It wasn't until later that night, when he and Fai were finally alone in the bedroom they shared, that he had a chance to ask.

"Where did you learn that?" he asked quietly, sitting on his bed, running a rag absently along Souhi's now-clean blade.

Fai was quiet for a moment, pulling on a nightshirt, then sat down on his own bed facing Kurogane. "I asked Syaoran-kun if he knew anything of the prayers and blessings of your country. He taught me those words." He looked up at the taller man, his expression a bit hesitant. "Did it work?"

Kurogane stared at the blond for a long moment, a variety of emotions - shock, annoyance, uncertainty, sadness, resignation - passing through his mind, before he let out a low chuckle and shook his head helplessly. "I think so," he answered Fai's question when his amusement had passed. "It seemed easier to destroy them today."

"Good," Fai said softly, before rising and turning to unmake his bed. "I'm glad."

Kurogane watched him in silence then, since the blond seemed uninterested in continuing the conversation, but the silence was not uncomfortable. There was something else he thought he wanted to say, but it was hovering in the back of his mind just out of reach, so he let it go and joined Fai in getting ready for bed.

The next day, though, when Fai came out into the entryway to repeat his prayer, Kurogane thought he knew what it was. Rising, he brushed that lock of golden hair briefly, meeting Fai's eye and saying "Thank you," quietly.

In some ways, that seemed to surprise Fai more. He grinned, mildly teasing, at the mage's expression as he turned to go.

/Maybe everything really is going to work out after all,/ he thought, pulling the door open and stepping out into the morning sun.

Behind him, very quietly, he thought he heard a whispered, "Hyuu So cool, Kuro-sama!" before the door swung closed.

He blinked at the concealing wood for a moment, wondering if he'd just imagined it, then gave something between a grin and a grimace. "Idiot mage."

But his expression as he turned and walked off to earn another day's good wages for his companions (_family_, some part of his mind acknowledged) was a fierce, pleased grin. /Yeah…everything's going to be fine./

----------------------

"It's not quite paradise,  
But it sure feels like home."

Bliss 66, _Not Quite Paradise_

----------------------

Rome - info about the Senate is fairly accurate, historically. I'm not a history major, I swear...  
Miko - Shinto priestess  
_sakaki_ - type of broad-leafed evergreen tree, often used in Shinto blessing ceremonies. Don't ask me where Fai found his, I don't know. XD

Hope you enjoyed, feedback is appreciated!  
-A


End file.
